June – the season for summer rain

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Decided to come out with a fanciful title post even though it might not have much significance to what I’m about to type but yea these days, the weather has been severely hot and humid. The sun can be shining brightly in the day, and the skies start pouring for an hour or so at noon, and then the afternoon sun will show up and blast all that humidity into the air, giving me a bad hair and face day. Such is life but there might be people somewhere out there that enjoys the rain (like the K-drama I just completed, Lovely Runner or something) but here I am baking and sweating in the humidity of my home country. (Humidity is 84% right now on my iPhone weather app)

If you had been a regular reader/follower of my blog, I know I’ve been very late in my once-a-month update I committed to myself. Unfortunately, I got lazy and busy (and fell sick twice during this period for separate reasons) and before I knew it, it is already June – which means that I’ve missed 2 months of updates (which is a real bummer). Well, my emotions had been all over the place the past two months, reaching several ups and downs which resulted in me being mood-less to write anything at all. On days where you just don’t feel like doing anything at all, you will just end up watching mindless Netflix and YouTube, scrolling social media and doing things that don’t need much brain power. I hope I don’t make it a habit to ‘not update’, but let’s see how it goes in the future. I don’t like the stress of commitments so I’ll try my best but not force myself to do anything if I’m not in the mood for it.

To write again after a long ‘hiatus’ was not an easy action. I debated internally for a few days before clicking the ‘add a new post’ button. The longer you are away from doing something, the harder it is to start; just like exercising – if you do something regularly it is easy but once you pause, it is hard to get the engine up and running again.. Please bear with me through this nonsense

Just some updates that no one asked for – I fell sick twice after my coughing spell which ended sometime in late March (after 6 weeks). The episode I had sounds pretty bad because I was actually hospitalized so that they can drip antibiotics into me. It was even more painful because I didn’t feel sick at all but my blood test results showed otherwise. I couldn’t fall asleep on the hospital bed and was ended up being a zombie tossing and turning in bed. The irony of it all was that during the period where I fell sick, something that I was hoping and wishing for (for an extended period of time since 10 months ago) happened and my emotions were left really awkward. Like there’s something I need to be happy about but then my body is pulling my emotions back, reminding myself that I can’t be too happy cause my health is all f-up right at this moment. Thankfully my body recovered over time and I was slowly pacing up my life to be back to normal and then I fell sick again. Nevertheless, I eventually recovered and went for a vacation to my current favourite country – South Korea. The word is ‘current’ is because Japan is quite top in my priority list too but the news of the crowd is making me delay my travel plans.

So yep it has been 5 months of 2024 and I’ve been to South Korea twice – Jeju and Seoul. It might sound ‘boring’ to repeat destinations but oh now that I got older, my travel perspective has changed significantly as I no longer crave to visit/explore new countries – but going to a place which is my comfort zone, a place where I can catch up and spend time with my distant friends – is really a good healing holiday. Do you have friends that you don’t meet and speak to regularly but the moment you meet up, the conversations can flow as if you guys were never separated at all. I’m glad to say that I have such feelings and emotions with a couple of my friends and meeting up with them do make me happy (though I’m not sure if they are aware and I highly doubt they read my blog). Anyway, I tried out something new for this trip – I did my first facial treatment in Korea! As it was my first time, I opted for a non-invasive treatment and I guess I should be writing a separate entry to share my experience with this new clinic at Hongdae. Not sure if it’s because I’m getting older plus the friends around me are getting more and more skincare-conscious, I’m somewhat influenced by it and I find myself paying more attention to skincare and taking care of my face in recent years. I had been diligent in putting a minimum of 3-step routine on my face every night – toner, serum and moisturizer and I’m becoming more adventurous in trying out new technology and product.

In recent years, I do have an increased fear of the concept of ageing. Seeing my parents shrinking due to muscle loss and witnessing and experiencing their deteriorating memory, it kinds of give me a window to what things would be like for me in future. I was not close to my grandparents at all so I didn’t really experience the concept of ageing back then but now with my parents, I feel the fear much closer to my heart. It is a little more worrisome given that I don’t have (and have no intention) to have offspring so sometimes I do wonder if ‘checking myself into a nursing room’ while I am incapable of taking care of myself is really as easy as the thought of it sounds. Minimally, I am and should be saving up enough funds for my retirement but with the growing inflation and life expectancy, who knows what I’ll be able to afford when the time comes. I’m thinking too much again right ><

Another thing I’ve been trying to work on is recently to ‘be more satisfied’ (and contended) with my current life situation. So basically what happened last evening is that two of my friends (that I’ve known from different sources) happen to meet yesterday and throughout the conversations, both of them concluded that I am never satisfied with whichever jobs I’m in. While it is not exactly a thing I am proud of but I am currently in my 5th full-time job (of my career lifespan) and as always, I have things to ‘complain’ and ‘be upset’ about. I keep reminding myself that I should contend that I am not affected by the layoffs yet, plus the job market outlook is really poor at the moment, and that I should be satisfied that I’m still able to get a monthly salary every month, regardless of the work that I am doing. I need to focus on the ‘haves’ and not the ‘have-nots’ but sometimes my mind just runs away and I’ll start thinking of the could-have and could-have been and then I’ll question my current self. Is it that hard to be satisfied in life, yet having the desire to progress as a decent human being? Hope I’ll find the answers to this someday.

Happy Sunday to all. I hope you had a well-rested weekend and you’re properly recharged for the next work week. I’m still having a little post-trip depression at the moment as 8 days in Seoul is somewhat not enough for me (I spent 16 days there last year). Wherever you are in the world, I hope the weather is treating you alright cause I’m simply melting away in the heat and humidity.

^^ Cya again, hopefully not too long later!

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